nagi_schwarz | Day 814: The Future Freaks Me Out

Also a song title. Yay for Motion City Soundtrack. We'll get to how I picked that title in just a moment.

Thursday was a long day. A lot of revising my cross after I'd already revised it once. Melilli has decided that I'm too nice a Mormon girl to be able to write quasi-porn in my cross and I need Team Dan's help. So I left a little note after the question in, well, question. At the end of the question it read, [Dan...help!] Everyone laughed. Including Dan.

I wasn't trying to be funny.

I made it through the day - got some good lunch, and revised my cross. Then went to class. Marriage & Divorce was good times, including talking about current events (widow of a marine being denied entrance into the United States due to ICE's issues with marriage by proxy). Afterwards I went and picked my parents up from the airport. I ended up, somehow, tailing Jake toward his place, and I'm pretty sure he thought I was stalking him or something until I made it to the airport.

We went out to Olive Garden for dinner, and the waiter was super nice. Dad and I went for the endless pasta bowls (but teeny tiny me only made it through one), and the waiter let dad put his first serving to go so Dad could have a second serving of something different. Afterwards Mom and Dad worked on the repairs for my AC, which has since ceased leaking all over poor Wendy's apartment, and I worked on my cross. We watched some random TV, and then went to bed.

This morning I was up bright and early to do my thing and go to school. Mom dropped me off, and I spent three and a half hours trapped with Melilli. He says my direct is pretty much ready to go once it's revised (and I just revised it, so there you go). Also, he had a few jokes about my being a nice Mormon girl. Because I don't swear.

He's never seen me angry.

I didn't think I was a nice Mormon girl, but apparently, I rate on the super-sweet scale. Even Jenny told me she found me "deeply religious". No one's ever said that to me before. It was strange.

Angela and I shared the to-go bag of Olive Garden (I put it in a green Barnes & Noble bag in the student fridge so no one would make off with it). Angela had it nuking and ready to go when I got out of trial training, and we ate together before she went to work and I went to the dental clinic. I got to see all of my dental student friends in action, which was cool. And I got my teeth cleaned. The dental student was a senior, a funny guy who told stories about creepy girls who've stalked him. He also said I have a teeny tiny mouth.

No one's ever said that to me either.

To my dental dismay, I have to get a filling, but at least it's not a root canal, so I'm happy. My teeth still kinda hurt, but he said I've been brushing my teeth wrong and if I do it right we'll be good. So I'm going to try it tonight. Mom picked me up from the hospital and we went to buy stamps, then return something at Lowe's. The lady at the post office asked why I needed so many stamps (I bought a solid 100) and I told her I average six or seven letters a week. She said I was probably keeping USPS in business. This week has been an awesome week in letters - I got mail from Sister Holmes, Aden in Texas, Sister Lee (who is not a missionary but an elderly lady in my home ward whom I've been written for a while; this is my first letter from her) and from Maleena, which is always good times. So I'm excited to write on Sunday!

Then I got all dressed up to go to the NADP dinner. I think it worked - they've converted me to their crusade against the death penalty. Although not for political reasons. Religious ones, I guess. The whole part where we're supposed to forgive everyone. Killing people isn't forgiving them. I got to meet five of the Beatrice 6. It was uncanny, meeting people I'd spent all summer studying and writing about. I got to meet Scott the recent law grad, with whom I'd exchanged emails. Jeanne bought me a soda because she knows I don't drink alcohol. And I got good food.

Amidst the speeches and applause, I dazed out a little bit. I hate schmoozing and networking, and I felt like a little kid dressed up in her mama's clothes even though the suit I was wearing was all kinds of tailored to me. I realized that this is my future - spending my Friday nights at fancy dinners in expensive suits and uncomfortable high-heels, rubbing elbows with senators and whatnot and really not caring. I was there alone, I was one of the few, the proud, the sober, and it was sort of like my own personal hell.

That's my future.

And it freaks me out.

It didn't help that I came home to happy Facebook messages about gaming and partying and the good old days.

First Saturday practice tomorrow with Melilli, so we'll see how that goes. I've contemplated doing my Saturday goth dealie and seeing how he deals.

My parents leave tomorrow while I'm off with Melilli. It's sad - I hardly got to spend time with them.

The future freaks me out.