Day 1085: Misbehavin' Ladies Tea Party and other fine weekend adventures

This week was a long work week. Got good writing done. Ivy and I are really solidifying our routine of morning walk, playing outside/working outside in the morning, working indoors in the afternoon. I got some good work done on my novel. Cody and I did grown-up things like see about getting cars registered and getting new driver's licenses, but Utah requires ridiculous amounts of paperwork for such things, so that day of errands was kind of fruitless, but we survived.

This weekend was awesome. Poor Cody spent it putting in windows, doing homework, and running errands. He got Ivy her first round of shots and also took her on a puppy play date with my sister's dogs. His parents and younger brother came down to help. I know his brother came to help because when I got home I found beer in the fridge and about had a heart attack - was I in the wrong house? Did thieves break in and leave beer? - and then I remembered that little brother drinks beer.

I spent the weekend with my girls. On Saturday I gave Ivy a bath, ran the dishwasher, packed, and headed north. I helped BenTen (redmintmillay) clean her place and rearrange furniture, and then we had a tea party. It started at three and ended at eleven, and there was sushi and burgers involved as well. My girl Del (delacoeur) was there, and I hadn't seen her in forever. We talked about grown-up things, like school and work and jobs. We talked about relationships - we are all married or in long-term committed relationships - and the stuff we wished we'd known before we settled in (although they're usually the things you can't really know till you're in the deep end yourself), like how much in-laws play a role in your relationship, and how to communicate, and how to prioritize what you look for in a partner. We also talked about old relationships, reminisced our college days, and talked about the rising generation. (Del is a high school teacher. She has much to say on the subject.)

Del, who is very sweet and very sensitive and still kind of our go-to girl when we need to get something off our chests (she was a psych major in college and had a couch in her dorm room when we needed to vent or chat), asked me how I've been since the miscarriage, especially since if I hadn't miscarried I'd be due this month.

All things being equal, I'm doing pretty all right about this, although pretty much everyone I've ever talked to who's had the same issue has said you never get over it, not really, no matter the age of the child when you miscarried. Still, when we actually started talking about it, I started crying, and she started crying, and then Kym and Bethany, who'd started their own conversation, looked over and were horrified, and then poor Kris, who'd just gotten off work and was striding into the kitchen to say hello to his wife, stopped dead in his tracks like a deer in headlights, and BenTen who'd gone to let him in also halted mid-step, and Del and I started laughing and promised Kris we'd had a good time and he'd just sort of showed up at the wrong moment.

But we had fun, talking and laughing and being loud and being happy. These are the people who were with me for the best and worth years of my youth, and we care about each other deeply.

After the others left, BenTen and I hung out a little, and then retired to bed.

I went to the first hour of church on Sunday - BenTen's not-ward is super nice - and then BenTen and I hung out. We ate and wrote and talked. I introduced her to the joy of Richard Armitage as Harry Kennedy in the Vicar of Dibley (and also John Thornton in North & South and Lucas North in MI-5). We hung out with Sei for a bit, who'd been having a bit of a lousy day the day before and we wanted to cheer her up. I saw her husband for the first time in years, which was nice. Also, we hung out with Kym and Kris - they shared their supper with us. I helped Kym fold paper cranes for her wedding decorations, and Kris showed us the logos he's been designing for our publishing house. The kid is a graphic arts genius and we are sooooo lucky to have him on our team. I am so excited for this crazy to get off the ground.

Today Little miss Ivy had a play date with a couple of dogs who belong to my girl Rose. We took all three dogs for a walk, and then we let them loose to play with each other, so she's super tuckered out and has been contorting herself into weird positions to sleep while I am typing. I spoke to my mum, which has been lovely, and I signed up for a community Spanish class, which should be wicked fun, and now I am going to spend time with my husband.